Why does owning possessions make us satisfied?

David S October 07, 2022 at 10:45 5050 views 23 comments
In trying to pose the question I was careful of the wording. Rather than using happy I chose satisfied. The main reason I pose this question is to elicit the views on the material world and ownership and possession. Of course our possessions can be many and varied but this is physical possessions we own.

Comments (23)

Deus October 07, 2022 at 10:56 #746154
Let me give you an example. I bought a football jersey a few years back and after a while it got worn out. At the time it was my favourite. I felt like I had style as well as serving it’s basic functionality that clothing does. Any other t-shirt would serve the same function but this particular jersey had 3 things that made it valuable to me.

1. The football team that I’ve lived since I was a kid.
2. I felt good wearing it.
3. Limited Edition. It would not be for sale in future seasons.

These are just my reasons.

For other possessions such as housing cars etc it’s got to do with its function and the ability it gives you to live a healthy and comfortable life.

Sentimentality was a big thing for me back then and to some extent it still is when it comes to the shirts I buy
Pantagruel October 07, 2022 at 12:13 #746168
Does owning possessions make us satisfied? Or does it make us want more?

I think we need to differentiate between needs and wants. Owning things you need in order to survive is necessary; as such, this type of ownership prevents stresses which might make you unhappy. Acquiring something that you desire is, of course, initially a good feeling. But does continued ownership after acquisition supply the same level of gratification? We bought a really nice 6 person inflatable boat after we moved near the beach and really enjoyed using it a few times that year. Next year we used it once. This year we didn't use it at all. So rather than being satisfied, I am feeling kind of dissatisfied with that possession. Really I am dissatisfied with myself for not using it, or for not knowing better.

Frequently, it isn't the owning but the acquiring that creates satisfaction. That can become a vicious circle.
Agent Smith October 07, 2022 at 12:14 #746170
Where's Elon Musk, the world's richest man, when you need him?
javi2541997 October 07, 2022 at 12:36 #746175
Quoting Pantagruel
we moved near the beach and really enjoyed using it a few times that year. Next year we used it once. This year we didn't use it at all. So rather than being satisfied, I am feeling kind of dissatisfied with that possession. Really I am dissatisfied with myself for not using it, or for not knowing better.


Interesting. We all have had a similar experience as yours. I think this happens because of the transition of time. We are happy and satisfied when we acquired the new possession, but when we are used to see and enjoy it, the object itself becomes boring.
Paradoxically, it is worse if we decide to sell it or pass it on to another. We need to maintain it in our possession because otherwise we would suffer of nostalgia for not having the object anymore, despite if we don't even use it.
Yohan October 07, 2022 at 18:07 #746262
Quoting Agent Smith
Where's Elon Musk, the world's richest man, when you need him?

Do you want his counsel or monetary support?

If counsel, here is a clue:
"Should prob articulate philosophy underlying my actions. It's pretty simple & mostly influenced by Douglas Adams & Isaac Asimov." E. Musk.

And his number 1 life tip:
"I think that's the single best piece of advice: Constantly think about how you could be doing things better and questioning yourself."

ThinkOfOne October 07, 2022 at 18:16 #746263
Reply to David S

Most aren't satisfied with what they do have. At least not for long- even if all their needs are met. That they aren't points to a lack of emotional maturity on their part. In fact, many could be satisfied with owning much less than they do. In some cases much, much less.
unenlightened October 07, 2022 at 19:37 #746282
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Agent Smith October 08, 2022 at 02:23 #746420
Reply to Yohan Good advice unless you're someone like me - 1 step forward, 2 backward! :snicker:
Seeker October 08, 2022 at 04:52 #746457
Quoting Pantagruel
Frequently, it isn't the owning but the acquiring that creates satisfaction.


Yes this.

However in and by itself there's an experience curve to it as I step into that pitfall less and less, most of the time stopping myself before begun as I've become very much aware of the phenomenon.
Merkwurdichliebe October 08, 2022 at 05:19 #746460
Quoting unenlightened
any nobody


That is my favorite term of 2022.
Merkwurdichliebe October 08, 2022 at 05:22 #746461
Quoting Pantagruel
Frequently, it isn't the owning but the acquiring that creates satisfaction. That can become a vicious circle.


I believe that is why genghis khan was so prolific.
Agent Smith October 08, 2022 at 08:23 #746472
That's hers.
Tom Storm October 08, 2022 at 10:13 #746514
Reply to David S Why would owning things not satisfy?
Agent Smith October 08, 2022 at 14:08 #746552
Quoting Tom Storm
Why would owning things not satisfy?


It does (for some, nay, most). It is the way it is!
David S October 08, 2022 at 16:21 #746568
It’s interesting to explore. Not arguably a new phenomenon either, far from it arguably. If there is archaeological evidence that ancient civilisations had the trappings of belongings like jewellery etc there is something that is still very much a thing. There is no doubt there is satisfaction but the underlying reasons may be many faceted.

I guess a very ubiquitous example these days is mobile phones. The utility of which is arguably but not quite able to totally quantified explicitly. Not that may be important anyway.

The idea however that owning “stuff” leads to satisfaction is probably undeniable. I just find it curious why as much as I do enjoy the possessions I have it’ surprisingly difficult to explain simply why.

I am reminded of a nice reminder from the series TV series Kung Fu. When Caine passes the test set by Master Kan to “snatch the pebble from his hand” when Caine retains it after having focused on obtaining it for so long Master Kan remarks that there is another ‘pebble’ that Man has saught after over the ages ….. “the Earth “.

It may be an extreme way to look at it but valid non the less.
Tom Storm October 08, 2022 at 22:50 #746634
Quoting David S
The idea however that owning “stuff” leads to satisfaction is probably undeniable. I just find it curious why as much as I do enjoy the possessions I have it’ surprisingly difficult to explain simply why.


It makes perfect sense to me. As physical beings our survival, comfort and enjoyment of life is enabled or augmented by physical objects like warm clothing, a home, transportation, land, furniture, tools, art, whatever. Owning those objects provides a predictability to our comfort and control over our environment. Satisfaction.

There are other questions you might tackle involving qualities or abstractions related to owning objects, for instance, status/luxury or how much is enough.
David S October 09, 2022 at 15:11 #746757
Reply to Tom Storm There are other questions you might tackle involving qualities or abstractions related to owning objects, for instance, status/luxury or how much is enough.

@Tom. Yes I think for me you hit the nail on the head there. In particular how much is enough. The comfort factor re essentially Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is potentially becoming a big issue for a sizeable portion of people (although I hope it won’t be) so basic food if energy bills escalate or shelter (home repossession) if I can’t afford higher interest payments. So assuming these needs met. And yes these same people will potentially still cling to their phones. But even if we have one or two nice things we possess why might we still feel dissatisfied, assuming we do?
Tom Storm October 09, 2022 at 22:08 #746816
Quoting David S
There are other questions you might tackle involving qualities or abstractions related to owning objects, for instance, status/luxury or how much is enough.


Indeed and that's different question. So is the question, why are some people still dissatisfied when wealthy?

Owning stuff is central to the human experience in most cultures. Given that society often judges people by what they own, it is sometimes hard to track if it is the object itself or some external validation which is the true prize.

Not hard to see how this might be distorted by psychological issues (hoarding) or by wealth (luxury goods) or by class and status. I knew a man who owned many high end prestige cars - probably about 10 at a time. It was pretty obvious from knowing him that this was not about owning cars. It was grief and self-esteem. But I think explanations for how people relate to material possessions are as myriad as those possessions themselves.
Paine October 10, 2022 at 01:21 #746869
Seeker October 10, 2022 at 12:58 #746989
Since monetary wealth provides more safety and better control of one's circumstances perhaps owning more possessions roughly equals the hoarding of such means (for as far as our brain chemistry concerns).

[quote=psypost.org]An analysis comparing reported income to reported well-being revealed a strong, positive relationship between the measures. People who earned more money reported greater day-to-day well-being and better overall life satisfaction.[/quote]

Source article
Agent Smith October 11, 2022 at 13:11 #747307
The "things" worth owning cannot be owned! :rofl:
T Clark October 11, 2022 at 17:03 #747398
Reply to Paine

Love Lyle Lovett. Love that song. But maybe this one is a little closer to my own attitude towards what I own. Actually, it's exactly how I feel about the things I own.



When I went looking for this, I was surprised to find out Lovett didn't write it, Guy Clark did. Love Guy Clark too.
T Clark October 11, 2022 at 17:29 #747406
Quoting David S
In trying to pose the question I was careful of the wording. Rather than using happy I chose satisfied. The main reason I pose this question is to elicit the views on the material world and ownership and possession. Of course our possessions can be many and varied but this is physical possessions we own.


I'll describe some of the possessions that matter to me:

  • A New England Patriots hoodie my younger son gave me when he was 15. I don't wear hoodies much, but I keep this in my car for when I need extra cover. Whenever I put it on I feel good remembering he gave it to me.
  • A hardcopy of the Oxford Dictionary of the American Language given to me by my daughter. I told her it was the best gift I ever got, and that's still true, even though I don't use it anymore.
  • A small orange woven rug. I am strongly attracted to orange things. This was a rug I gave my wife. She didn't like it, so now it's mine. It makes me feel good every time I see it.
  • Silverplate - Roger's Brothers "Oval Thread" pattern. I found a fork with this pattern in an old box of silverware. I looked for the pattern on line and then started buying it when I found it on Ebay or Etsy. I've given sets to all my children. I feel pleasure whenever I use these. I think they're beautiful and they feel good in my hand.
  • The same for W.S. George petalware plates and bowls. They're thinner than most chinaware, but still have some heft.
  • When someone asks me what I want for Christmas, I usually say "something orange." I have a large bowl and a pepper mill I got from my younger son. Both are orange and both are beautiful. I feel good whenever I use them.
  • I used to wear Aloha shirts a lot, although I don't so often now. I like the way they look. I like the way rayon fabric feels as it drapes over my shoulders.
  • I like glassware in general. It always amazes me how inexpensive beautiful glassware can be. I like the feel of a glass in my hand. The way it looks. I generally like thin glass, delicate but with some weight.
  • I have a pair of silk long underwear I only wear about once a year. I just used them this past weekend. It always amazes me how well they help me keep warm under my clothes. They're very light and thin but they work wonderfully. I'm a hairy guy, so they also help keep heavy clothes from pulling and binding on my skin.


I could go on but I guess that's enough.