Deodorant by Jack Cummins

It was getting dark and Chad had not done his mother's shopping. He had been too engrossed in reading in Wetherspoons, drinking glasses of Chardonnay topped up with soda water. He had got lost in the words and world of Sartre's 'Being and Nothingness'. He had lost track of time. He had closed his eyes and a short, thickset woman with greying hair, wearing a badge saying 'Manager' had pounced upon him and said, 'You'll have to leave if you are sleeping.'
'I'm not sleeping. I was thinking.'
'You had your eyes closed for ten minutes,' she said with a frown on her freckled forehead.

Knowing his mother was alone, probably hungry, waiting for him to bring home some food, Chad felt pangs of guilt as he made his way to Sainsburys. He struggled to find and read his mother's shopping list and he knew that he had too much wine. He was not sure if he had fallen asleep in the pub, an attempt to blot out the anxiety of trying to cope with his mother's deteriorating health. She had lost so much weight.

He walked round and round, looking for 'Bliss' yoghurt, apple pies, bananas, toilet roll and the top item on the shopping list, deodorant. Now, he had the trouble of selecting a meal his mother would eat, and she had said, 'Don't bring pasta with red sauce.' She had always preferred cakes and sweet food. He ended up with microwaveable vegetable curry as it would be quick to cook.

He wandered along the High Street, which was deserted except for downcast people wrapped in sleeping bags. He hoped that he would never end up in that predicament as he felt himself to be a bit of a waif and stray. He had no other family apart from his mother, and no one to turn to in times of desperation. But, he did not wish to wallow in self-pity, as it was a hopeless spiral. The bus was a long time coming and he almost felt the temptation to go back to Wetherspoons but he thought of his poor mother. He wished that there was a seat at the bus stop as he felt a bit woozy.

At last, the magic red bus emerged and he was glad to step inside as it was chilly weather for June. The bus seemed to stand for an eternity. He glanced in the carrier bag and discovered a mistake. He had picked up extra-strong men's deodorant. Mother would not be pleased. She was ultra-feminine, with her permed hair, still putting on makeup every morning, and her pile of chic-lit books from the mobile library. He also began to worry that his mother would realise that he had been out drinking again.

Opening the door, his mother, whose big dark blue eyes looked sad, said, 'Wherever have you been? You look spaced out'.
'I'm fine. I was in the coffee shop reading'.
'All this coffee is not good for you. I hope that no one put drugs in your coffee', she replied and he wondered if that was what she really thought.

He made his way into the kitchen and put the shopping away. He put the vegetable curry into the microwave and sat down on his bed. He needed quiet space and was tired and he didn't feel hungry. The meal was a little overdone by the time he switched it off. He added some salad to cheer it up, trying to avoid the parts of dying lettuce. He took the meal to his mother's chair and she ate very little. They are in silence and he gave her an apple pie and a yoghurt and she seemed pleased, but said,
' You've stayed out late and we don't have any time for music now. I had hoped we'd listen to Bruce Springsteen. I was looking forward to that and have been so bored by myself.'
'Yes, it's just about time for bed. We'll listen to his new album tomorrow afternoon.'
Chad went for his bath and went to bed but his mother waited up for the cat, Plato, to come in from the garden.

When Chad emerged from bed in the morning, his mother was washed and dressed and made up. She smiled at him and said, 'I really like the deodorant. Is that what you use? It's great'.
'I'm glad you like', he replied, having forgotten about his mistake. What a surprise and a relief. He had feared that she would refuse to use it at all.

Several months later, he was talking to his mother's friend, Joyce, who had just done the shopping and she said how she had to drive a long way because the local shop was out of the men's deodorant. Joyce said,
'She is such a lady, but she will only wear extra strong men's deodorant, because she worries in case she smells 'bad'.
'Yes, I know', and Chad smiled to himself as he put the four antiperspirants away into the cupboard next to the many packets of toilet rolls.